Myths offenders tell themselves about child sexual exploitation

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   In other cultures (e.g. Thailand, Cambodia), there aren’t the same taboos about sex with teens. It’s accepted there. I wouldn’t have sex with a minor here but it’s okay if I do it overseas—it’s different there. (See Fact)

   Sex with children and youth is not an acceptable part of anyone’s culture. Sexual slavery is often the result of families and children living in situations of poverty and/or armed conflict. Many teen girls and boys are tricked or forced into lives of prostitution. It is not a choice. It’s abuse.

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   Some teens and kids are sexually provocative towards adults. This means they are comfortable with sexual contact. (See Fact)

   Children and youth who have been sexually abused may display sexualized behaviour. Although this might appear as though they are inviting and wanting sexual contact from adults, this is a symptom of their victimization as they have learned that the way to get “ love/attention” from adults is to engage sexually. This behaviour is a sign that the child/teen needs help and should be protected and not further exploited and victimized.

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   Engaging in sex for pay is not a big deal and it’s not always easy to tell if the person is an adult or a teen. Also, they always lie about their age anyway. (See Fact)

   Engaging in sex for pay with a minor is harmful to them. It is sexual abuse. It is up to an adult to determine the age of his/her sexual partner. If you are uncertain about a potential sexual partner’s adult age, assume she/he is a minor.

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   Those being trafficked into Canada and other regions are usually from desperately poor countries. At least if they’re getting paid for sex, they and their families can work their way out of poverty. (See Fact)

   Paying for sex with children and youth is not an act of charity, it is an act of abuse. Further, it is rarely the children and youth who profit from sex trafficking. It is the pimps, brothel owners, drug dealers and other intermediaries who benefit financially. Children and youth who are being sexually exploited find it very difficult to exit from the abusive situation—keeping them in poverty and danger.

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   I’m always very nice to the girls/boys I pay to have sex with. I’m never violent and, in fact, I think they like having sex with me. I’m not doing any real harm. (See Fact)

   The minors you are paying to have sex with do not enjoy the experience. They are forced to pretend they are enjoying it. The fact that you are having sex with a minor makes it a “violent” act whether or not you are doing other physical harm to their bodies. Your actions are also causing deep emotional and psychological harm to those you are victimizing.

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   If those girls/boys didn’t want to be selling sex, making easy money, they wouldn’t choose to do it. (See Fact)

   Children and youth do not “choose” to have sex with adults for money. They typically become involved in this behaviour through being manipulated, intimidated and abused by adults who use them for their own needs (e.g. sexual financial). Many times, money does not even end up in the hands of the young person being victimized. Sometimes children who have been previously neglected and abused may relent to sex with adults because of situations of desperation (e.g., young people exchange sex for food, shelter or to feed a drug addiction). Young people who are sexually exploited are at high risk for many health problems including sexually transmitted infections (STIs), are routinely physically harmed and experience psychological and emotional damage. Being forced into using sex to survive is definitely NOT an “easy way to make money”.

Need help?

If you’re an offender or are having thoughts of sex with children, there is help. Stop the demand. Seek help.